Relationship Status….

The second update in my life is that the guy that I was with that I told you guys about is no longer my boyfriend. The 2 years that I was with him was a longggggg 2 years and there was a bunch of shit that I didn’t tell anyone, not even my family. 

For 2 years, I was in an extremely abusive relationship. verbally, emotionally, and physically. I’m not going to get into detail about it because I’m over it (to a certain extent) and I have moved on. But I was finally able to gain the courage to leave him and think about myself and my happiness. Even though he made it tough as hell for me to finally get away from him, I stood my ground, had people that loved me around me to support me , and got the police involved. 

I’ll tell you this, being in an abusive relationship will really change you. I really was that girl who said that I would never let a man put his hands on me and if one did, I would leave immediately. But I didn’t…

He was manipulative, controlling, compulsive, and I got tired of pretending to be happy. I was never happy and felt like I was stuck. My problem was that I kept holding onto the good things that happen in our relationship thinking I would forget about the bad shit. But I didn’t…

I stayed in the relationship to make HIM happy, not myself. I was miserable whether I wanted to admit it or not. I felt like my life wasn’t normal and this was not the path that God wanted me to take nor my father (RIP). Those are the 2 people that I don’t want to disappoint. 

When I finally left, I felt so free and a HUGE weight was lifted off my shoulders. I felt like I could breathe again. I felt like my soul could come out again. I felt like I could finally be myself. This was one of the toughest decisions I have ever made in my life. It came with a ton of crying sessions, yelling sessions, fearing for my life and reputation, and finally opening up to everyone about the truth. I know that deep down, I’m damaged as fuck. But I can deal with it or just seek help later on in life.

This was the best decision I ever made.

What are your thoughts on abusive relationships?

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4 comments

  1. i’m so proud of you for leaving such a toxic situation and being so open about it, you’re a great writer and what i can tell a great person ! there’s so many great things on your path and i’m sending you all the love for your future 🖤

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Congratulations on walking away, it’s not an easy thing to do. Make sure you talk to someone if you start to notice it affecting you in current life. I started struggling with sleep when I left a… let’s call it, difficult, relationship. Eventually, I went for help because I figured it couldn’t hurt and it did me the world of good. Best of luck x

    Liked by 1 person

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